End of Summer Is the Perfect Time to Begin Important Conversations

August and I have always muddled through a love-hate relationship together. As a boy, I adored the month.  My birthday falls in August, and to me the 31 days represented birthday parties, presents, warm weather, and a full, glorious one-third of summer. The looming threat of the new school year was in September – light years away in a child’s mind.

Then, I grew up, married a teacher, had children of my own, and saw the local school calendars adjusted. Suddenly, August represented the END of summer, and a time when laid-back family time crashed to a halt.

Now, I’m an empty-nester, my wife no longer teaches, and I’m no longer chained to a school calendar. I’ve fallen in love with August all over again.  But not just because of the continuation of warm weather and longer evenings. I also view August and the back-to-school transition as a perfect time to talk to your aging parents about their legal and care needs.

Why now?

Many adult children are fresh off reconnecting with parents and grandparents after vacations, family reunions, and summer visits. You may have noticed changes in their health, mobility, memory, or daily routines. These observations don’t necessarily signal a crisis, but they can be a reminder that planning ahead is far easier than making important legal decisions during an emergency.  Unlike the holidays, when emotions and expectations often run high, late summer tends to offer a calmer opportunity for meaningful discussions. Having these conversations before they’re urgently needed gives everyone more time to think through options and make informed decisions together.

What Should Families Talk About?

Elder care planning isn’t just about having a will. A comprehensive plan helps ensure that your parents’ wishes are known and that someone they trust can step in if necessary.

Topics to discuss may include:

• Does everyone know where important legal documents are kept?
• Is there a current will or trust?
• Have powers of attorney been signed for financial decisions?
• Are backups in place behind their primary agents?
• Is there an advance healthcare directive outlining medical wishes?
• Have they discussed long-term care preferences?
• Are beneficiary designations up to date?
• Have they thought through the logistics of who will help them in the future get to a doctor’s appointment, pick up their prescriptions, or even change a light bulb in their ceiling fan, particularly if their children work or are out of town?

These conversations don’t have to happen all at once. Even taking the first step can make future planning much easier.

Starting the Conversation Can Feel Awkward

Many adult children worry that bringing up these issues will upset their parents or make them feel like they’re losing independence.

In reality, most parents appreciate being included in decisions about their future when the conversation is approached with respect and compassion.

Instead of focusing on worst-case scenarios, frame the discussion around preparation and peace of mind.

You might say:

“We’ve been getting organized for the fall, and it made me wonder if there are any legal or healthcare documents we should know about in case of an emergency.”

Or:

“I want to make sure your wishes are honored if something unexpected ever happens. Have you had a chance to review your financial and care plans recently?”

Simple, open-ended questions often lead to productive conversations.

Planning Ahead Protects the Whole Family

When legal documents are missing or outdated, families are often forced to make difficult decisions during already stressful situations.

Proper planning can help:

• Reduce confusion during medical emergencies
• Avoid unnecessary court involvement
• Protect financial assets
• Minimize family disagreements
• Ensure your parents’ wishes are followed

Most importantly, planning ahead gives everyone confidence that important decisions have already been made.

It’s Never Too Early to Review an Estate Plan

Even parents who created wills years ago may need updates. Changes in family circumstances, finances, health, or state laws can all affect whether an estate plan still reflects their current wishes.

A periodic review helps ensure that documents remain accurate and effective.

We’re Here to Help

Starting the conversation is often the hardest part. Once your family is ready, an experienced elder law attorney can help review existing documents, answer questions, and create a plan to protect your loved ones and honor their wishes.

As your family settles into a new season, consider adding one more important item to your fall checklist: a conversation about legal and care planning. I can’t promise you that it will make you fall in love with August all over again. But I can almost guarantee you’ll learn important lessons from your parents as the new school year begins.